Looking Through the Wave

Wave As I stand on the threshold of this new decade, an unexpected joy and spaciousness greets me. For days my focus has been on how pivotal this decade is in terms of the Climate Crisis. If we fail to totally change the way we fuel our lives and our economy within this ten years, we will pass the crucial tipping point in global warming. The resulting cascade of environmental changes could lead to an Earth that can no longer support human life. So, why is there hope and joy bubbling up from my core?

It comes from an understanding of my role, and the task for all of us who are committed to living an Earth-centered life in our later years. We are called to become the Elders of our culture and to serve as spiritual elders have for centuries, as those who see in that darkness and look through to the light.

Here is what I experienced in a recent shamanic journey:

I was standing on a beach as an old woman, wearing a simple long dress, with a shawl draped over my head and shoulders. I was facing out to sea. In the near distance was a 500 foot standing wave. It was a solid wall of water, which had paused for a moment before crashing into the shore where I stood.

I was not afraid, and there was no urge to turn and run. There was nothing I could do to stop or change the wave. I was asked to look straight at it and on through it to what exists beyond. What I saw was a vibrantly alive forest and a pristine, thriving Earth. There were many varieties of plants and animals in the undergrowth.

When I asked about humans, I was told that they no longer live in big concrete structures. I was shown a gathering of small hut-like homes made of natural materials. The people emerged from their dwellings, walked out into an open meadow and began singing their love for all of the gifts of the Earth and stars. I was told that the People had rediscovered the heart of gratitude and harmony.

The general message was to stay calm. Look through the noise, confusion and chaos of these times. Hold in focus the Web of Life returned to vibrant health and balance.

It was a call for us to serve as the Wise Elders of our culture. We are here, to do deep spiritual work to aid the transformation of the relationship of humankind to the natural world, and to the Sacred Source of Life. The changes needed in our outer lives can only be empowered by a renewed love for all living beings. When every expression of the natural world is a dear member of our family to be honored, served and cherished, we will rediscover our appropriate place within the Web of Life.

This is a huge challenge, and we are those who are here at this time, and at this point in our lives to meet it. There is no panic, no hurry, only the clear gaze of those who can see through the wall of water that separates us from Life. We stand together, looking into the future. We focus on the Earth beyond, in which our children’s children to the seventh, the fourteenth and the twenty-first generations will find joy and peace.

To honor our common spiritual journey of the healing of Earth and Her Children, I am now offering one-on-one Spiritual Direction. This process of bringing all of life into focus around the sacred nature of life is open to people of all spiritual traditions and practices. For more information, follow the link above or contact me at earthcenterednancy@gmail.com.

Happy New Year !

Winter Solstice Happy New Year! In the flow of Nature, today is the first day of the light returning to the Earth in the northern hemisphere. I find it a great time for a new beginning in the flow of my own life and in relationship to the world transformation we are experiencing.

Yesterday, we celebrated the Winter Solstice in two phases. First we released the past and any habits/beliefs that we do not want to carry into the new year. Second, we received wisdom for our way forward with the question, “What do I need as I live from my deepest gifts and life purpose?”

It has been windy here on the Mount Shasta property. The huge pine trees, with there nearly bare long limbs with tassels of long needles at the ends, have been dancing and bobbing wildly the past few days. The wind has been the energy to wake me in the night to do shamanic journey work, and the one who called us outside yesterday to receive wisdom.

Walking around the property, feeling the wind and listening with my heart, I was guided to release the following things:

1) My focus on the mundane aspects of living this life with its specific challenges. I can not let my days be about the logistics of living an Earth-centered life in a motor home with the support of a warm cabin. It is time to just live with no special thought required. This is my life now.

2) My obsessive anticipating, calculating and carefully parcelling out our monthly income to pay our bills. There is a flow of resources which is sufficient for our basic needs. It is a flow I have experienced throughout my life, and it does not require my repeated attention to sustain us. Focusing of this only distracts me from the creative flow of offering the gifts that are mine to give.

3) My myths of not having the discipline, determination, motivation, stamina, or connection with creativity to complete the book I am writing. If I do not release these mental anchors, they will slow the unfolding of the words, pages and chapters of the book I want to let emerge into the world.

Returning indoors, I wrote these out. We then held a ceremony to feed these into the flames in our fire place and released them with the smoke to be transformed.

The second phase was to move directly into drumming and journey to see what ways will open before my feet. I received wisdom from the embodiment of my future self, who I know as Woman of the Mountain. I will share some of what she told me.

What you will share does not come from within you. Instead, the work that you are doing flows through as the culmination of the sacred work done by those seven generations, fourteen generations and twenty-one generations ago. They tend the well-spring of creativity which is the source of your words and creative work. Your task is to come with gratitude to these helping ancestors and to allow your work to move through you as a gift to the generations that will follow you.

I also asked for wisdom about the Spiritual Direction work that I will begin offering in 2020. Her response was:

Again, do not think of this as something of your own intellect and experience to be given to others. Instead, let yourself sink into the sacred relationship of trust and honesty as you experience it in the Unseen canyon lands. This is the container needed for both listening and companionship along the inner journey.

In deep gratitude for the ceremonies and wisdom of the Solstice, I step into this New Year.

Over the next few weeks, I hope that you too will take time to release all of the past that clings too heavily, and to find the deep well-spring to fuel the living of your life’s purpose in the year ahead.

Joy to the World

jump-for-joy_0 Joy is one of the most sacred, healing and enlivening energies in the universe. It is at the heart of many of the celebrations of this season. It is also easily overshadowed by the cultural expectations, emotional investment and economic drive of these last days before Christmas and New Year’s Eve. I want to call us back to this transformative flow of joy as the best possible gift to both give and receive this season and throughout the coming year.

Why do I cling to my barriers to Joy? I, along with many adult humans, have learned that there is something dangerous about this illusive force. There are some powerful myths that we seem to take in with our mother’s milk and never question throughout our lives. One of these is that if you allow yourself to feel joy, with every cell of your being, that the next experience in your life will be one of tragedy and loss. We have been conditioned to believe that joy is a gift that at any moment will be snatched from our hands and sent crashing to the floor, to teach us never to reach for it again.

As a defense, our mind calls joy a “soft emotion,” appropriate for small children and elderly relatives. Those of us with any common sense know that it is dangerous and not to be trusted. But that is only because it is so very powerful in transforming our perception of the world, and therefore the quality of our lives.

Joy rises from that place of mystery, between unseen energy and visible expression in the world. When joy emerges, it comes as an irresistible force, almost volcanic in power, bursting forth from deep within. Joy is what makes the sprout push upward through the soil into the sunshine. It is what drives the beat of the drum and the soaring of the music. Joy makes the flames of the fire leap and dance. It is joy that wells up within the human dancers, fueling their exuberance and movement. When it breaks out from the core of our being, it changes everything we see, hear, taste, touch, intuit.

Consider the truly joy-filled people you have encountered in your life. You have surely met at least one person whose whole being shines with light, love, and peace. These are not naive or feeble-minded individuals. They have lived life fully, experiencing both happiness and sorrow, illness and health, gains and losses. They have also learned the secret to overcoming the fear that joy will lead inevitably to grief. They have discovered the power of gratitude. Gratitude for what brings them joy, but also gratitude for everything that occurs in their lives.

I would invite you to consider this simple opening to joy:

Each morning, as my day begins, I sing my gratitude to the elements of nature and all the living beings who share the beauty of this place. I ask to live in harmony and balance. I offer my thanks for my life, this land and the man I share my life with.

As evening comes, I offer gratitude for everything that happened during the day. Everything. Sometimes it is a new awareness of how petty and self-absorbed I am, and how I let anger and fear take too much of my day. Other times wisdom or friendship have taken me to a new place of understanding. Whatever has happened, I welcome it as a gift to help me see my unique human experience on the Earth. All that is revealed adds to my willingness to question the barriers I carry that keep me from living in freedom, simplicity and joy.

In this season, may we all follow the lead of the little ones and old folks who laugh freely and sing playfully. May we enjoy those who are openly light-hearted and shine their love into our lives. May we find joy infectious and irresistible.

In the words of the song from Three Dog Night:

Singin’ joy to the world
All the boys and girls now
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me

Adapting to Our First Winter

There is nothing like a blizzard, bringing a general coat of 2 feet of snow and drifts of 4 feet, to bring the reality of winter home. Unless perhaps it is the second storm in the same week making that level 4 feet with a 6 foot berm from road edge to rear of Subaru. We weathered this first pair of storms well, but it has made clear that living in this close relationship with nature calls for adaptation and flexibility in our plans

Brego, our Winnebago, is 30 feet long and requires a good sized circular drive in the back field in order to turn around to nestle back in to the electric hook-up and the wind shelter near the cabin. That means that taking him out to empty the holding tank, or to refill the built-in propane tank would take major snow clearing. From the vantage point of a gentle fall season, that seemed like a simple matter of waiting for a break in weather, and using the snow blower to clear a path.

When the snows came, we found that the snow blower starts, but has little enthusiasm for moving in any direction. It lacks a reverse gear and seems to lean all it’s considerable weight into the ground when you try to push it up any modest incline. So, it basically refuses to work beyond clearing level paths between cabin and trailer porch (where our extra wood is stored) and Brego.

Our first instinct, rippling up from our past life, was “Of course we need a new, lighter, efficient snow blower. That’s obvious!” But, recognizing all the expenses of the fall, and using some adaptive thinking we discovered that we really don’t need it. The berm calls for shovel work. Working on it gently, we cleared an opening for the Subaru in two days. We have all we need to be snowed in. There is no place we need to go. So, a snow shovel and whatever modest help this old dear snow blower can give us will do just fine.
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We are approaching the propane question two ways. We will check to see if the local delivery service will wave their minimum fuel amount if they top off our tank when they are delivering to neighbors. We are also leaning into the availability of electricity to heat Brego with space heaters to the levels I am accustomed to (See my blog “Preparing for a Winter Flow). It took me a few days to realize that I do not need to leave the motor home at ice box temperatures to conserve fuel and keep the electric bill down. I just need to be conscious about when I need heat and when the warmth of bed or an extra layer of clothing allows me to turn the heater down low. We did buy a simple heating pad to warm the foot of my bed before I crawl in at night, and I celebrate that luxury.

In preparing for the first drop of temperatures into the single digits, I have added to Brego’s internal insolation. There are various materials up under the dashboard to block the air flow from around the gas/brake pedals. Over the four main windows, old blankets provide a fourth layer, and drape down to the floor. There are rubber-backed mats along the aisle way, a heavier curtain on the doorway, and there are pillows tucked up in the ceiling vents. I can’t think of much more that I can do to keep the heat in and the cold out.

In terms of the holding tank, there is also a duel solution. First, I have begun using a night bucket as much as possible. That experiment is going well. With my aging knees and hips, it is not quite as easy as ten years ago when a night bucket was standard equipment for the hermitages at the Zen Practice Monastery. I am grateful for the experience of all those retreats that makes this seem more natural now.

Since the shift in Brego’s mobility came as a surprise, I have also learned that I can empty the holding tank, one bucket at a time. It took about an hour, and six trips to clear his tank from being 35% full. But I now know that if it is necessary, I can care for that need as well.

And today, five days after the snows stopped, it is warm and rainy. Who knows, we may be able to get the motor home out just fine. We will wait and see how things look the next time we need to move him. So, adapting continues, as a breath-like expanding and contracting. We see what is possible in the moment and remain grateful through it all. All we need flows into our lives and we are learning how powerful it is to live in this intimate relationship with land, weather and life.

(Our deep gratitude to those who have given us regular support through our Patreon pages. It makes a world of difference in our lives.)

Seeing Through the Holiday Season

OXmrpW Our eyes, minds and nervous systems have been deeply trained to follow the surface patterns of our culture in an exaggerated way as the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays approach. It is as though a switch is thrown and we go unconscious to our usual self-care, balance and common sense. We are swept into overindulging in food, entertainment, buying, gift giving and family/friend gatherings. We push our energy to the limit to meet some inner standard of what we should be, and lose sight of who we are and what has meaning in our lives. In short, we run head-long into the prison of our economic system and end up carrying debt, extra physical weight, exhaustion, and heavy emotional fallout that keep us overworking and distracted well into the new year.

Instead of falling into this trap, we can set our intention to see through all of this illusion and unhealthy conditioning. I invite you to walk away from the noise and confusion of the cultural norms and into the spaciousness of the unseen spiritual mysteries that fill our lives.

The secret: We must remember who we are and that what is true of us is true of all human beings. Before, through and beyond this Earth-walk existence, we are beings of light – expressions of the amazing love and infinite creative energy which has formed our universe and beyond. The playful, powerful, wondrous, imaginative force that births all the living beings of this planet, brought each of us forth as an unique embodiment of life.

Each of us is a creative soul who knew the purpose and path through this lifetime before it ever began. That we have been distracted from that path and lost sight of that purpose is natural given the noise and confusion of our current world. Our loss of focus does not mean that we do not remain beings of light who possess the energy of love, creativity, and the gifts of self we came here to share.

When I look at all the people in my life, near and far, I remember that we are all made of the same elements of earth, air, water, fire and spirit. The spark of life the enlivens us, also animates all living beings – not only flesh creatures, but mountains and streams, trees and shrubs, physical buildings and automobiles. We are all beings of the same stuff, here honor and support one another.

When I carry this perspective back toward the holiday season, several things emerge:

1 No living being is truly honored and celebrated in vast amounts of food and drink consumed, or in the mountain-high stacks of presents under a tree. The inherent beauty and natural gift of each is lost. One taste overpowers another. Another glass of “holiday cheer,” adds to the depression of body and mind, and separates us from one another. Package after package of new toys, gadgets, trinkets or treasures dulls gratitude for the deeper gifts of life, love, friendship and connection.

2 When I see all of the people in my life as beings of light, I know that there is no “thing” they need from me. Whether they are near of far from me, it is my willingness to hold their inner being in focus throughout the year that seems the greatest gift I can offer. If I can remain open to the creativity, unique perspectives, their individual path through challenges, and their capacity for it all clearly in my heart, every encounter becomes a celebration.

3 Winter is an inward and reflective season. In this hemisphere, the whole outward rush of November and December pushes us straight against the pattern of the natural world around us. It is as though we are so afraid of what the quiet, inner journey will reveal, that we run out into a world of light, color, sound, party, and tradition, to avoid discovering our own light. It is not that we all need to become introverts or go into hibernation mode when the days shorten and the weather grows cold. But this season does invite a different tempo and focus for our creative energy.

May you find your own ways through this holiday season, which honors the light of your being and with wisdom of your soul. May you see through the distractions of the season to discover the deepest and richest gifts of joy, life and light in your life and in the lives of all those you love.

(I had hoped to post this a few days ago, but a winter storm captured my time. May your celebrations of gratitude be filled with joy.)

Seeking a Gift Economy

One of the most tenacious threads of our mainline culture is our market-based economic structure. It is also the most essential one to break in order to live an Earth-centered life. The very nature of capitalism is to view everything as a resource with a monetary value – whether tangible item, talent, skill, or person. As I shift to viewing all around me as living beings – trees and rocks as well as animals and birds; cabins and cook pots as well as human friends – all emerging as gift from the One Source, I choose to look to a gift economy as a way of passing along what I have been given.

What gifts do I have to offer at this point in my life?

A perspective which emerges from a lifetime spiritual journey, which has moved from Christianity, through Zen Buddhism, to Earth-centered shamanic practice. I have lived this journey full heartedly, sinking deeply into each of these spiritual practices with mind, body, soul and spirit allowing it to become a vital part of my life. Each stage covered decades of time, and the depth and complexity which each one deserved.

Before I received chaplain’s training or spent 12 years as a clergywoman, I already possessed an innate calming presence and ability to companion people going through times of crisis or major life transition. This capacity only deepened in my time working with hospice, and co-leading Still Point Zen Practice Center. I am still learning to listen to the depth of people’s experiences, and find my shamanic journey work helpful in developing this skill.

I have dedicated my life to living an Earth-centered life for my remaining years. The willingness to leave a middle-class lifestyle and purchase a 30-foot motor home as our residence is only one small factor. I continue to deepen my relationships with the land on which we live, the mountains in whose shadow we dwell, and all the living beings who share this region with us. My shamanic practice takes me into the unseen realms, where I open to wisdom born of our interconnections within the Web of Life, and bring back images and insights to add to my words and writing.

Each day I greet in gratitude for my life, this land and the wonderful man who I share life with. I do shamanic journey to nurture the Web of Life and aid in the healing of the human family which is essential to the healing of the planet. I spend time dreaming the dream of the reality of harmony, life, creativity and balance which I want to see emerge beyond the current breakdown of our culture.

I am currently writing this blog – Earth-centered Living After 60 and a book that shares the same themes: Spirituality, Living Appropriately as a Human Being in the World, Living in Harmony with Nature, Leaving the Cultural and Economic Systems Behind, Golden Years, Taking the Journey Together, and Practical Matters. In this way I hope to share one way of moving into a new harmony with all living beings.

Beginning in the 2020, I will begin offering Spiritual Direction for those who are seeking to deepen their inner journey. It will be based in my Earth-centered spirituality and shamanic journey practice, while also inviting those who touch the mystery of the unseen world through other spiritual traditions and practices. Watch for a new page on Spiritual Direction to learn more.

What do I seek in return ?

Freedom to live my dedication to Earth-centered living as deeply as I have lived the rest of my spiritual path.

Freedom from making my spiritual practice a market-based way of making a living.

Support of a simple way of life as I write the book/s that are emerging from this lifestyle and my shamanic journey experiences.

Freedom to explore how to offer deep listening to individuals as a means of supporting their inner healing, without making it a business.

To support this I am looking for Patrons –

People who are not able, at this time, to do the work or live the practice that I am, but are interested in witnessing what this path might hold.

Individuals who are interested in seeing my writing come to fruition, and providing the freedom from money-earning that I need to write both blog and book.

Those who want to support my shamanic journey work and my approach to healing the land, humankind and all living beings.

Those who are intrigued by the concept of deep listening or spiritual direction combined with shamanic practice as a support for individual healing work.

I am using a very helpful site called Patreon which provides a channel for individuals to support others who are creating art, books, and music. “Support My Work,” in the side bar will take you on to my Patreon page. The Patreon site will lead you in the steps to contribute a monthly amount that you feel is appropriate. I welcome contributions of $5 or $10 per month, because many people are living a very simple life with limited financial resources. In addition, I am seeking a handful of people who can offer $20 or more per month, as a sustaining flow for our lives. Each patron, at any level of giving, will receive an additional monthly article taking you deeper into one of the Earth-Centered Living after 60 themes.

For a beautiful description of where Patreon fits within a new flow of economy, I invite you to read David Cain’s article: Two Ways to Keep the Fountain Flowing: https://www.raptitude.com/2019/11/two-ways/

As always, this website/blog will remain available to all, free of charge. I also appreciate you sharing what you read here with others who you feel would value what I offer. This is part of the central gift of my life and I want to let it ripple outward beyond my small circle of family and friends.

Preparing for a Winter Flow

Cabin and Brego As the season moves from autumn and fall toward winter we are making a number of adjustments to help reduce fuel consumption while keeping ourselves warm. We have decided that since both the cabin and Brego (our motor home) need to be kept warm enough to protect pipes and possessions from too great a temperature dip, we will use both. Bill sleeps in the cabin; going to bed early and rising early to do Qi Gong and write before the sun rises. I sleep in the motor home, sometimes waking in the middle of the night to do a shamanic journey.

When I get up, he already has the cabin warmed into the low 60’s and I give Brego a ten-minute burst from the central propane heater to warm things from 47 to around 50. This also gives me a chance to use the small space of the bathroom as a warming closet for my clothes. I layer my “lounging clothes” over my night clothes, greet the morning, and then head to the warmth of the cabin and the coffee that awaits me. On mornings when it is below 30* on the porch, Bill starts a fire in the small iron fireplace to take the chill off the small living room.

When the sun is up over Black Butte, I remove the three layers of insulation from Brego’s south-facing windows. I drape the felt over the couch to protect it, raise the Venetian blinds and reposition the reflective silver insulation sheet to catch as much sunlight as possible. By mid-day, the temperature will be 65 – 70. Friends have recommended the large diameter bubble wrap attached directly to the window to let in light, so I am trying to gather that for both dwellings from stores who are trying to recycle their packaging.

Many of our days are still spent out on the land or hiking the nearby trails. Yesterday, we went up the mountain to collect fire wood along a forest service road. Bill will spend part of the next few days sawing it into pieces that fit the fireplace. He is also working on a spiral path to Grandfather Tree. I am tending the young transplanted trees, keeping a small pond available, and using pine needles to lightly mulch some dry spots in the meadow.

Other days we are both at our computers, sometimes using the afternoon warmth to do Qi Gong or do home care and maintenance. Our ritual of sitting out at the bench in our meadow has moved earlier, now that the sunset is nearing 4:15. After some time to share about our day, I go in and put the insulation back up in Brego and we share dinner and the evening in the cabin, which the space heater easily keeps at 60 – 65.

When snow comes and temperatures drive us indoors, there are books to read and others to write. It will be soon be time to create rich soups and drink spice tea. The creative energies will find new expressions. But there will still be walks in the woods and shoveling snow it keep us connected with nature.

A month or so ago, I asked some of my family and friends if they had any yarn to share. I have received about 20 skeins and leftover balls of earth-tone yarn. I’m 2/3 of the way through knitting a warm afghan for the bed, and plan several other projects to keep my hands busy and my lap warm this winter. Today, I will unpack my sewing machine to begin making curtains for three of the windows in the cabin, hoping to add another layer of warmth.

We have decided to drain the motor home’s fresh water tank, in order to protect it. The hot water heater in the cabin is wonderfully efficient, so showers and dish washing are easy to do there. With a new dryer off the bedroom, the cabin also provides the luxury of warming our clothes while we shower. I think this will be one of my favorite treats when colder weather comes.

At about 7:30, I change into nighttime clothes with lounging clothes over them before I return to Brego. There is another brief burst of propane powered heat to make the transition to bed. Here I do journey work, read and settle down for the night. A small electric space heater in the aisle is set to come on to help keep things above 47* through the night. I climb in under a delicious pile of blankets, draw my scarf over my head and nestle in the a good night of sleep.

I wanted to share these practical matters with you, because it is all part of the fabric of living an appropriate life as a human couple seeking balance with the natural world. We are trying to keep our foot print small even as our living space is now closer to 600 square feet. We are also welcome the bundling up, eating warming foods, and cuddling which make us look forward to the winter.

Extraordinary Challenge

gretathunberg_2018x-1350x675-1 The outcry of the young is reaching me here in my mountain home. A young woman who has been speaking out for the planet, and trying to get people to listen to what science has told us for most of my adult life, has burst into the public eye. Greta Thunberg’s message tells me that while my inner work is vital, the use of my voice is also essential to being dedicated to the healing of the Earth and all her children.

It was her call for a “state of emergency” response to climate change that caught my attention. If she is right, there is no time to go through endless arguments. If she is wrong, there is no harm done in placing the survival of the planet above the accumulation of money and material goods. One goal she mentioned in a TED talk was the reduction of CO2 emissions by rich nations by 15% per year with a goal of 0 emissions in 6 – 12 years. This is an incredible goal. It will be a miraculous achievement when obtained. It is a nearly impossible challenge which is perfect for this time in our evolution as human beings, and for the work of grandmothers and grandfathers.

We who are seeking to live earth-centered lives in our 60’s and beyond are perfectly placed to lead the way. We have experienced massive changes in our world over the course of our lives. Many of us have let go of “earning a living,” and are settling into a more simple lifestyle. We are aware of the ultimate transition of this lifetime awaiting us on the near horizon. We have worked through many of our illusions, confusions and imagined needs. We have learned that living in harmony with the Earth is a spiritual as well as a practical path.

What are we willing and able to do to slow the rate of carbon emissions? How do we hold to our commitment in the backlash of our conditioned mind telling us that it will not be enough? How do we create an outward space that supports all living beings, while continuing to work on our inner being to allow more of the flow of light, love and creativity of the Sacred Source to flow through us as healing energy for the planet?

These are questions I want to explore on this page. They are at the heart of “Earth-Centered Living after 60,” as we weave our inner/spiritual energy with the outward/practical expressions of deep connection with All That Is. We will each look to our own wisdom and spiritual guidance to see what is ours to do. We needn’t become overwhelmed, since we are each a single cell in the amazing organism of Life.

I think of our parents’ and grandparents’ wisdom. They lived in a less technology-based world and developed ways of living with very few material comforts. They faced rationing in times of war; endured the poverty of depression era living and were often part of immigrant populations forced to migrate far from their homelands. What are the stories you remember of “Victory Gardens,” “Mend and make do,” riding a bicycle to work rather than having a car? Are there images and practices waiting to be rediscovered? Can we honor our personal and collective ancestors by looking to them for the wisdom we need now to help us survive as a species?

From my youth, I remember President Jimmy Carter responding to an energy crisis by inviting us all to turn down the thermostat in our homes and wear sweaters. He cut the highway speed limit to use gasoline in a more efficient way. Can we adapt and adjust these recommendations to help us now?

I am making a renewed commitment to writing in this blog one a weekly basis. I hope this will nurture a forum not for debate about whether extraordinary measures are needed, but how we might take them in our daily lives, in service to this beautiful planet. Please share this with others who may be interested in this community. To face this challenge, we are going to need all of the creative ideas and open hearts we can gather.

Some other background links for Greta and the IPCC report:

The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, 2018: IPCC Report

Greta before the US Congress included in: Several speeches in US in September

Life is Not All Petting Bunnies

bunny This was what I was told in a recent journey to one of my teachers in the Unseen world. I’m finding it to be very true.

We have nearly come full circle from the time we made the decision to release our 3-bedroom rental house and it’s lifestyle. In a month, we will pass the one year point since the end of my work as a bookbinder. So many changes, and not all of them “petting bunnies.”

This life calls for a great deal of honesty with myself and about myself. I can not sink into the relationship with nature; with all living beings; with my deepest sense of calling, if I am hiding out from myself and others. One of the impacts of paring things back in my life is that when I find something I am unwilling to let go of, there is something important hiding behind it.

My bookbinding equipment still sits in a storage area, which is costing us a monthly rental fee that our budget can no longer support. Yet, I have limited my attempts to sell it to people connected with the bookbinding schools in this region. I was talking with Bill this morning and finally found the courage to explore why.

My bookbinding business failed. I had given myself fully to learning the skills to both create hand bound books and journals, and to do complex book repairs. I had gathered more and more materials, papers and equipment. I tried new craft fair settings, and extending the hours I spent in this work. But the business failed. In fact it failed to the point that we are now going through bankruptcy because of the debts it accumulated. That sense of failure and the accompanying shame keep that equipment and materials locked up in the dark.

I had designed a scenario in my mind of finding the right young bookbinding student, and having my equipment go to helping them set up their studio. I wanted to have a story of generosity. I wanted to pretend that leaving bookbinding was part of the natural flow of moving toward motor home living. What I am learning is that all of this is hard to admit, but vital to my story. If I am going to stay honest about the challenges of this life (and its promises), I need to share deeply.

This is made easier by a TED talk Bill found yesterday. Brene Brown spoke for 20 minutes about Vulnerability , it is liberating. She points out that while vulnerability is at the base of many of our fears and much of our shame, it is also the fundamental basis for creativity, joy and whole-hearted living. Failure is part of life as we give ourselves to commitments, relationships, or projects with all of who we are. We have to launch ourselves into that flight of creative possibility, without reservation or fear. It is not that we are being unreasonable, it is just that we are letting our heart propel our life.

I would never trade the life I have now for a return to a successful bookbinding business. I would not trade my hours of walking the trails, journeying for wisdom to ancestors, and singing for the healing of the Earth, for endless hours in a bookbinding studio creating the most incredible books.

This land and this mountain have claimed me. We have been asked to remain here on this 3 acres of land, to care for it and for an aged cabin for Bill’s sister. Our home on wheels is a strong shelter providing all we need. We have food and some of the cleanest water on the planet. We have just enough in the bank to make the monthly bills, while the generosity of the Universe continues to flow to us in amazing ways.

Our small home keeps me growing in my intimate relationship with rain and wind, phases of the moon and song of morning birds. It is a strong reliable shelter for our living. My devotion to living for the healing of the Earth and All Her Children deepens every day. It is not all petting bunnies, but the transforming flow of life keeps showing me flowers.

P.S. – The bookbinding equipment is now up on Craig’s List.

Conversation with Money

snowflake I was introduced to this concept through a free introductory session from Shift Network for their course: “The Generous, Loving Energy of Money,” with Sarah McCrum. While I generally veer away from anything that ties spirituality with money, abundance, … I loved her tone. Her premise is that “Money” is one of the most misunderstood forms of energy in the universe. Our conditioned mind, our personal upbringing, our cultural messages, and our life-long experience of ambivalence with money, lead to a love/hate relationship with it.

One of her books: “Love Money, Money Loves You,” emerged as she had conversations directly with “Money.” She recommends this practice, and I am amazed at what has emerged over the months as I have used it. I will share a bit of my dialogue, but encourage you to try it for yourself.

I first did a journey to meet the energy of Money, and found that it appeared in the form of a snowflake — full of light and beauty. In a dialogue that followed, Money affirmed this image as much more helpful that the cultural dollar signs and price tags that we have been taught to place on everything, including our own worth and the value of our life purpose.

In following Sarah’s example, I took time to quiet my mind, and then just sat at the computer, typing my questions and watching what emerged as I typed responses.

An image of the flow of financial resources into my life being like the flow of water available for a garden has been very helpful.

N: Good morning my snowflake-shaped friend. As I open to the possibilities of your flow in support of my life, I find that I am more open to admitting I want that support. But then, I immediately go to, “I don’t want to sound greedy, …” I do not want my relationship with you to become one where I am clawing at you trying to get more and more.

M: Okay, do you see where you veered from your original open, honest, vulnerable statement and went right into an age-old myth? When you make “What I want to support my life” = “Greed” we are in shut-down mode. One of the worst names anyone could call you is “greedy,” so your analytical mind, which wants to stay between you and me, throws out that name to get you to move away and “be reasonable.”

N: Yes, that seems to be what happens. I am to weigh, measure and compare my wants/needs very carefully before I ask for anything. The one in me who does that process is afraid of wanting anything more than bed, rice and beans.

M: Remember that I am not the miser here. My flow is available and unlimited. What you receive does not limit what flows to every other living being. Money is not limited – currency may be, but Money = Nurturing flow to support life purpose, is not.
I am not a Comptroller who is managing your life. You are responsible for the requests you make, the focus you hold, and the way you decide to channel the flow as it comes. If you asked for more water for your garden, the canal operator would not tell you which vegetables or trees to put the water on – he would simply increase the flow. You could not complain to him that you drown your parsley and that your lettuce never matured because of the dry conditions. I am not trying to control your life – I am not here to determine your life focus, nor to make you a good person — or a bad person for that matter. I am a resource which is eager to enhance life on the planet – to bring peace, love, joy and fulfillment. So, can you go back to the beginning? What is your life purpose and what can I do to help support it?

N: I want to give the gift of my life purpose: “Being an open, human channel for the flow of the Love, Creativity, Harmony and Light of the Sacred Source.” I want to be one who helps bring the sacredness of all of life back into our human experience. I sense this is nurtured by my Shamanic Journey work and a deepening relationship with all living beings. It may be expressed in the weaving of a book from some of the insights this work brings.

I do not see myself working very much in the outward, ordinary world. I give my life focus for the benefit of all beings, and the healing of the planet Herself. In return, I seek a flow of financial resources to sustain the simple life Bill and I are living, with freedom from worry about bills and unexpected expenses. I will continue my inner work to open to this flow into and through my life.

May you have your own conversations with “Money,” and find a new relationship with it that brings freedom, peace and joy to your life.